Looking for Star Wars jokes in Alderaan places? Well, these Star Wars puns hit with considerable ... force.
70 Star Wars Jokes and Puns for Both Sides of the Force
Either you know that Star Wars fan, or you are that Star Wars fan. You know, the fan who hums the cantina song as they cook, uses flirty Star Wars pickup lines, or can make the school run in less than twelve parsecs. If your friends and family respectfully intone “May the 4th be with you” every spring, you know you’re that fan. As a fan, you also know that the only thing better than watching the Star Wars movies in order are laughing at Star Wars jokes and Star Wars puns.
When it comes to Star Wars jokes, one might say that Yoda best. That’s right, we’re taking the ele-Vader to new heights of humor. You’ve got to Han it to us! We may Leia it on pretty thick, but these Star Wars puns and jokes below will cause Ani one to laugh.
So read on for some of the best jokes and puns about the Star Wars universe!
Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more humor, cleaning, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.
Best Star Wars jokes and puns
- How does Wicket get around Endor?
Ewoks.
- What do Gungans put things in?
Jar Jars.
- What do you call Chewbacca when he has chocolate stuck in his hair?
Chocolate Chip Wookie.
- Why does Princess Leia keep her hair tied up in buns?
So it doesn’t Hang Solow.
- How do you unlock doors on Kashyyyk?
With a woo-key.
- Which Star Wars character works at a restaurant?
Dark Waiter.
- What’s a baseball player’s least favorite Star Wars movie?
The Umpire Strikes Back.
- Why did Anakin change his name to Skywalker?
He couldn’t stand the old one Ani longer.
- What do you call an invisible droid?
C-through-PO.
- Which Jedi became a rock star?
Bon Jovi-Wan Kenobi.
- What did Obi-Wan say at the rodeo?
Use the horse, Luke!
- What’s the most popular Star Wars movie in Italy?
The Phantom Venice.
- How do Ewoks communicate over long distances?
With Ewokie Talkies.
- What do you call a bird of prey with a thousand lives?
A millennium falcon!
- Why was the droid angry?
People kept pushing its buttons.
- What do you call Siths piled on top of a lightsaber?
A Sith-Kabob.
- What do you call a Jedi in denial?
Obi-Wan Cannot Be.
- What would you call Padmé if she was a dog?
Petme Imadoggie.
- Which Star Wars character travels around the world?
Globi-wan Kenobi.
- What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side?
Darth Tater.
- When did Anakin’s Jedi masters know he was leaning toward the dark side?
In the Sith Grade.
- Why did Anakin Skywalker become a musician?
He had great chords on the dark side.
- Why doesn’t Yoda ever use email?
Because he always prefers to send a forceful message!
- Why can’t you trust the Empire’s elevator?
It’s always up to no good.
- What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K?
“HD I am.”
- Why do droids never have a good sense of humor?
They lack protocol.
- Why did Han Solo refuse to play cards?
He didn’t want to be cheated by the Empire.
- Why did Chewbacca refuse to play cards with Han?
Because Han kept “chew”-ing the deck.
- What do you call a Mandalorian in space?
A “Star Bounty.”
- Why are the Sith so good at poker?
Because they always have a “dark hand.”
- Why did Yoda bring a ladder to the bar?
To reach the “high ground.”
Star Wars Jokes Episode I: Become Pun with The Force
- Which program do Jedi use to open PDF files?
Adobe Wan Kenobi.
- Which website did Chewbacca get arrested for creating?
Wookieleaks!
- What do you call a pirate droid?
Arr-2 D2.
- Why is Yoda such a good gardener?
Because he has a green thumb.
- And why can’t you count on him to pick up the tab?
Because he’s always a little short.
- What is the name of the Gungan who became a taxi driver?
Car Car Binks.
- What do you get if you cross a bounty hunter with a tropical fruit?
Mango Fett.
- What did Yoda ride as a kid?
A do-cycle. Because there is no tri.
- What droid always takes the long way around?
R2-Detour.
- Why did movies 4, 5, and 6 come before 1, 2 and 3?
Because the director, Yoda was.
- Is BB hungry?
No, BB-8.
- What did the specter of Obi Wan Kenobi say to the bartender?
“Give me a beer and a mop.”
- Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road?
To get to the dark side.
- Which Jedi had a musical career?
Bon Jovi-Wan Kenobi.
Star Wars Jokes Episode II: Bar Wars
- The Star Wars opening crawl walks into a bar.
“Get outta my pub!” the bartender yells. “We don’t serve your type here.”
- Luke walks into the Mos Eisley cantina, cradling a slab of dirt in his arms.
“What’ll it be?” asks the barman.
“A pint for me, and one for the road.”
- Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant.
Ten minutes into the meal, Luke’s still having trouble with the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere.
Obi-Wan finally snaps, “Use the forks, Luke.“
- A clone trooper walks into a pub and asks the barman, “Hey, have you seen my brother?”
“I dunno,” says the barman, “What does he look like?”
- A Hutt slithers into the food court. The cashier says, “Hey! We have a pizza place named after you!”
The Hutt says, “You have a pizza place named Jabba Desilijic Tiure?”
- The Death Star’s shield generator walks into a bar.
The bartender scowls and says, “Alright pal, I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”
- Lando Calrissian walks into a bar, orders a drink, and sits down at a table in the corner.
The bartender jerks his thumb at him and says, “Lando’s a great pilot now, but I remember when they used to call that guy Crasho.”
- Darth Vader walks into a bar in December.
The bartender says, “Merry Sithmas, and what’ll it be?”
- An Ewok strolls into a bar and says to the bartender, “I’ll have a whisky and … soda.”
The bartender says, “Sure thing—but why the little pause?”
“Dunno,” says the Ewok. “I’ve had them all my life.”
Star Wars Jokes Episode III: If Darth Vader’s Final Words Were Dad Jokes
- “Luke … I’m reading a great book about Force levitation … I can’t put it down.”
- “Luke … I want you to have my car…I hope you weren’t hoping for a ToYoda … May the Porsche be with you.”
- “Luke … did you know I almost joined the Jedi Debate Team? … Somebody talked me out of it.”
- “Luke … did you know R2D2 used to work for me? … He asked to be paid under the table.”
- “Luke … I just watched a great documentary about how the Death Star was built … It was riveting, Luke. It was riveting … “
- “Luke … I know what you’re going to get for your birthday. I felt your presents, Luke … “
- “Luke … I’m the reason you can never beat me at Monopoly.”
- “Luke .. I never got to teach you how to fold a fitted sheet.”
- “Luke … I didn’t borrow your car. That’s just the Force.”
- “Luke … don’t even think about touching my vinyl collection.”
- “Luke … now they’ll really never see me at the family reunion.”
- “Luke … now you’ll never have to hear me sing again.”
- “Luke … no matter what happens, always take out the trash.”
- “Luke … I am your father … but next time, don’t leave your shoes in the hallway.”
- “Luke … I am your father … and I’m just glad I didn’t pass on the whole ‘helmet hair’ thing.”
- “Luke … yes, I’m taking the remote to the afterlife.”
Submit your best joke here and get $25 if Reader’s Digest runs it.
Additional reporting by
